I love birthdays.
By Izzy Teng
Admittedly, my birthday is my favorite holiday. As selfish as it sounds, the reasoning truly isn’t so.
Birthdays have turned into a culture of extravagant parties and elaborate gifts. People spend weeks planning each intricate detail: their outfits, the table setting, the music, etc. It’s not to say that these things aren’t special, however, I believe that in focusing so much on the materialistic parts of birthdays, we lose sight of why we celebrate them in the first place: to honor life.
Don’t get me wrong, I undeniably enjoy receiving gift cards and makeup, but I’ve also found that as I get older, those things hold less value. Birthdays are a celebration of the day we took our first breath on this earth, and are a reminder to be grateful for the millions of breaths we’ve taken since. Life is a precious commodity, so to be able to celebrate that each year is a quiet blessing.
People often ask me how it feels to turn whatever age I’m turning, and to be transparent, half of the time my answer is “not that different”. To be fair, nothing about the day itself is actually different–but something about the reflection it brings, is. Birthdays aren’t about what we’ve gained but how we’ve grown, and to be able to look back on that is extremely sentimental.
As a teenager, the amount of change I experience in just a year is appalling. However, within the nights of crying over someone leaving me out or getting mad at myself for messing up on a test is a version of me that’s constantly learning and evolving. On my birthday, I’m able to pause and look back at that. Not just to recognize where I’ve grown but to realize I’ve made it through another year of becoming. Becoming someone stronger and bolder. Becoming someone I know would make my younger self proud.
I’ve been through the pain of feeling different, of feeling rejected. I understand what it is like to dislike myself and feel mediocre. However, I’m learning to realize that those moments don’t define me, they shape me. Every time I’ve felt a sense of self doubt isn’t a moment where I’m broken, rather a moment where I’m coming to understand myself better. In those times, I’ve come to meet myself with patience rather than frustration, and a recognition that growth takes time. For me, there’s a resilience in giving myself grace. I am bound to make mistakes, and though being kind to myself can sometimes be the most challenging thing to do, it’s also the most rewarding. Sometimes, it’s the act of simply continuing on that feels the hardest, but that’s what my birthday has become to me. I’ve continued to grow in spite of the weight of my challenges, and that in itself is worth celebrating.
I don’t need the extravagance of a celebration because ultimately, I’ve realized that birthdays aren’t about how loudly we celebrate them but how deeply we feel them. For me, it is enough to be surrounded by the love of the people that remind me that I’m worth celebrating in the first place. The true gifts are the people that make my life feel like one, and I am grateful to feel the abundance of the community I’ve built around me.
I am stronger because I get to grow, I am driven because I know there’s more to become, I am creative because I recognize the possibilities in everything. Each birthday, I’m reminded not only of the years I have lived, but of the privilege of growing. I can’t wait to meet the new version of myself next year.
